My mood swings ...

For the past 3 years I've been working here, today is the very blardy first time I cried due to my unhappiness at work. Nothing big has actually happened, just some frustrations towards the things I've been working on so hard all these years.

I've been through a lot in this company ... ups & downs + satisfactions & disappointments. Having good team mates, enjoy the big family spirit in the work place here. Well, I consider just about everyone I have met here to be friends. No matter how tough were my works, I never drop a single tear nor bitch on anything, because I love my job, I know what I want. Nevertheless, I still love my job but not the company anymore.

When Ann resigned 2 years ago, I tried my luck & asked for a promotion to the Executive post. But they turned me down, I accepted the fact that I was too new to be in that post during that time. I continued to work harder & learn every single little things in the department. After 2 years, Nora left, people around me start asking why don't the company promote me (God knows what's in their mind). Some of them even made a stupid assumption that I'll definitely be the one this time. However, the management rather choose to hire a fresh new girl without any experience to train her from the beginning, but not promoting a staff who was half-trained in the company for 3 years plus. I told everyone that I do not care about it, I'm happy with my current status .. Yes.. I was lying! I was not happy, I was just covering my disappointments. I do care! I've tried my best to learn everything in the department for the past 3 years, be the best I could ... aiming for a higher post & a better future. But all my hard works seems to have gone invisible!

Last month I received a letter from HR. I was being nominated as one of the Best Employee of the year. I was so happy when I read the title of the letter, however my heart dropped when I continued reading the following paragraphs ...

"Though we are not proceeding with the nomination for the Best Employee Award for the year 2008, the good performance your job has been duly acknowledged by the management. We hope that you will continue with your good efforts and quality work in the year ahead with appreciation."

Blardy hell ... you guys could have just kept your mouth shut, pretend no one has been nominated this year and continue to be the most stingy horrible boss ever. I guess I would feel better if I never know I was shortlisted.

Now you know why I'm leaving ...